McReary Thanksgiving
by Howl of a Werewolf
Summary: This is how it goes, every year..
1. Chapter 1

**This idea was given to me by Big Bang Theory and Two and Half Men.. My favorite sitcoms.. So I'll have references to both.**

* * *

Dash, while having her Ipod attacted to her car, and had it playing _Nivana - Heart Shaped Box_ playing loudly, drove onto the McReary's drive way, she was invited to celebrate thanks giving with them, sense they see her as family.

"(sighs) Let's do this" Dash said to herself, taking a drink out of a Bud Light bottle she brought with her.

* * *

Dash rang the door bell, voices are heard from inside.

 _Kate: (shouting) Packie, the door!_

 _Packie: (shouting) Here's an crazy idea Kate, ANSWER IT~!_

 _Kate: I can't I'm busy!_

 _Packie: (shouting) I'm busy too, so you answer it!_

 _Kate: (shouting) I can't! I'm on the toilet!_

 _Packie: (shouting) For fuck sake, I don't need to hear that! Can't you just say, I'm busy!?_

 _Kate: (shouting) I said I was busy! But that wasn't "good enough" for you!_

 _Packie: (shouting) You know what! I hope it's one of those home invasion deals, AND THEY SHOOT ME IN THE HEAD!_

 _Kate: (shouting) Well, if it's a home invader, don't tell them I'm on the toilet!_

Packie answers the door.

"Hey, hey, you made it!" Packie cried excitedly, and gave Dash a hug.

 _Kate: (shouting) Who is it!?_

"It's Dash!" Packie shouted back.

 _Kate: (shouting) Well bring her inside! We don't need bugs!_

"The bugs only come here, BECAUSE YOUR THEIR QUEEN!.. (calmly to Dash) So how was your drive?" Packie replied.


	2. Chapter 2

**I got the idea of this chapter from my friend RedRose..**

* * *

SOON AFTER:

"Alright.. I'll get the turkey" Packie said, heading into the kitchen.

"Packie, can you get the turkey?" Gerry asked, having not fully heard him.

"I SAID I was getting it!" Packie cried annoyedly.

"FIne. I'LL get it!" Gerry groaned.

"I GOT IT!" Packie screamed from in the kitchen.

"Say Dash.. Where's Niko?" Kate asked.

"He isn't coming.. But after last year.. Can't say I blame him" Dash replied.

* * *

 _LAST YEAR:_

 _Packie see's Niko and Dash kissing, and without warning he suddenly shoots a_ _taser into Niko's neck, nearly killing him._

 _"WHAT THE HELL PACKIE!?" cried an enraged Dash._

 _"The creep was making "the move" on you!.. And I don't want my new sister whoring herself!" Packie cried, still a bit drunk from earlier._

 _"WHORING MYSELF!?" Dash cried, even more angry now._

 _"Yeah!" Packie cried._

 _"Look.. It's been a year now.. Just let us be" Dash cried._

 _"Fuck that.. He touches you again.. I'll cut his fuckin throat!"_

 _"Jesus Packie!" Dash cried, a bit shocked._


	3. Chapter 3

**I decided to set this after the orginal Crazy Times.. But in this version, Kate didn't die, she stayed with Maureen.**

 **It's the only way Niko and Dash would be dating now. She is considered part of the Bellic family as WELL as the McReary family..**

* * *

"What's with the extra table spot?" Dash asked.

"I invited Francis" Maureen replied.

"Fuck that!.. He takes one step in here! I'm taking out my fuckin gun!" Packie threatened.

"Oh come on.. He can't be that bad" Dash insisted.

 _ **LATER:**_

As soon as Francis arrives, he begins acting like a dick to everyone except Kate and Maureen, even Dash was insulted, much to Packie's anger. To the point Packie DOSE reach for his gun, but then Maureen walks in and he had to calm himself down for her sake.


	4. Chapter 4

AT DINNER:

"I've been waiting for this, all year.. Giving you people the _bird_ " Francis joked as he brought over the thanks giving turkey.

"Yes.. That joke gets funnier and funnier each year" Gerry said sarcastically.

"Say.. Where's Dash?" Packie asked, realizing she wasn't at the table.

Dash came over, though unfortunately she was drunk, and shouting about aliens.

"Damn it Dash.. That wine was for EVERYONE!" Kate cried, almost angry.

"(Laughs) Leave it to Patrick to bring a drunken bitch into our family" Francis laughed, but Packie wasn't so amused and stood up up angrily.

"Fuck you Franky!.. She's not a drunken bitch!.. She's a sweet and caring kid!"

"Yeah right.. Say.. What are her _rates_ " Francis laughed, as he implied Dash to be a hooker.

Packie responded by throwing a pumpkin pie into Francis's face.

"Hey! I worked all day on that!" Gerry cried angrily.

Francis threw it back at Packie but he ducked and it hit Gerry accidentally.

"(laughing) He got you good!" Dash laughed.

"Oh yeah.. (throws food at her, though more playfully then Packie did to Francis) Not so funny NOW!" Gerry laughed.

"We're gonna eat in the other room" Kate and Maureen both said, takng there plates and hiding to another room to eat at.


	5. Chapter 5

**I recently re-watched the Will Farrell movie SEMI-PRO.. And sense this story is a comedy.. It gave me an idea.**

* * *

Dash, Francis, Gerry and Packie, after finishing their food fight, where now actually EATING the food.

Francis ate something, that caused him to say "Oh my God. What the fuck is that? It's incredible?"

"It's called fondue" Gerry replied.

"Fon what?" Francis asked.

"Fondue... Three different cheeses melted.. That's what you're tasting.. Gorgonzola muenster and cottage. It's the latest thing from Sweden apparently" Gerry told him.

"Well, I'm not surprised by that. The Swedes are so inventive aren't they?" Dash insisted.

"Oh, they are. - Yep. They are my favorite producers of pornography!" Packie insisted.

"Over share!" Dash laughed.

"He's right though.. Swedish porn was the only thing... that kept my mind off Charlie when I was in Vietnam" Gerry insisted.

"You were never in Vietnam you jive turkey!" Francis laughed.

Everyone fell silent.

"Did you just call me a jive turkey?" Gerry asked, with the look of murder in his face.

"No.. No he did not... He uh called you cocksucker... R- Right-Right Francis?" Jackie nervously laughed.

"Yeah, yeah. I just called you cocksucker" Francis insisted, now scared.

"I'm pretty sure that you called me a jive turkey" Gerry said sternly.

"No, no. Now, Gerry, nobody called anyone a JT" Packie insisted.

"Jive turkey is a little over the line my man!" Gerry told Francis.

"Look we're all here. We all heard what was said and we're in agreement.. Francis.. said cocksucker.. That's all he said about you" Packie insisted, this "somehow" being the better word.

"Dig into that fondue you little cocksucker" Packie joked nervously.

"We like playing games, don't we?" Gerry said, still a stern voice.

"Yes.. We do we're playing one right now!" Francis insisted.

"Well.. I'm gonna show you guys this game that I learned.. (suddenly stands up and points loaded revolver at Francis) When I was in FUCK NAM!" Gerry cried angrily.

"Oh shit!" Dash cried, actually showing a bit of fear.

But suddenly Gerry burst into laughter.

"Gun's not loaded!" Gerry laughed.

Everyone sighed in relief.

"You all should of seen the looks on your faces!" Gerry laughed.


	6. Chapter 6

MEANWHILE:

* * *

"FUCK OFF PIGS! ALL WE DID WAS ROB A FEW JEWELS!" Cried a masked gunman, with a deep voiced man,with a Irish accent.

But the cops didn't care, and continued shooting at him.

The masked man shot back at them, revealing to have a pump action shotgun.

Before long a car pulled up.

"What the fuck took you so long Niko!?" The man cried to the driver.

"Forget it.. Just get in Gordon" Niko ordered.

"Fine. Fine" Gordon groaned, snd got in.

* * *

AFTER ESCAPING THE COPS:

Gordon Sergeant and Niko Bellic were both unmasked now, Gordon was examining the Jewels he stole.

"Was it worth it?" Niko asked.

"I fuckin hope so.. That bookmaker depts are only getting WORSE!" Gordon replied.

"Mind if I have one.. I can give it to Dash, her birthday is approaching" Niko insisted.

"Hmm... That depends.. Will you send me a photo of her boobs?" Gordon insisted.

"Fuck no.. Just give the fuckin Jewel!" Niko said sternly.

"Oh come on!.. Just ONE picture!" Gordon insisted.

"Hmmm... You know Gordo.. You should have a hospital check on that knife wound" Niko insisted.

"But I don't have knife wou-

Suddenly Niko stabs a knife into Gordon, and than radios that Gordon has had an "accident".

"Fuck you's!" Gordon growled.

* * *

LATER, OUTSIDE THE HOSPITAL:

Niko, after the doctors treated Gordon, returned to his car.

'Well.. With all the mention of Dash.. Perhaps I should check on her' Niko thought to himself.


	7. Chapter 7

"Say.. Do you ever hear back from that Michael De Santa guy?.. He seemed to like you, friend wise" Dash asked.

"Michael?.. Oh, right, Michael.. Sure. I have him on LifeInvader.. Check out his latest post" Packie replied, showing Dash his LifeInvader page.

 _(Michael Townley says: "Dear Liberty City.. Bring Patrick MrCreary back to Los Santos, and I'll give you Trevor Phillips")._

"Yeah.. That dose seem like something, Michael would say" Dash laughed.


	8. Chapter 8

"You made it!" Dash cried, hugging Niko.

"What happened to your leg, boyo?" Packie asked Gordon, seeing his leg bandaged up.

"He slipped and fell... (eyes Gordon) Right?" Niko replied.

" Yes.. I slipped and fell.. Down the stairs" Gordon said nervously.

"Yes, now he knows what stairs are capable of doing when you don't treat them with respect" Niko joked.

"Yeah... ( _under breath_ ) They sucker punch you when your eyes are closed" Gordon replied.

"Say.. Um.. How's Roman sense... That day?" Dash asked.

"He's fine.. He's been though worse" Niko insisted.

"You sure.. He seemed pretty shaken up" Dash replied.

"He'll be fine.. He seen plenty of people get shot" Niko insisted

"What the hell are you guys going on about?" Packie and Gordon both asked.

"Well.. A few days ago, I decided to spend some time with Niko's cousin, he seemed like a nice guy.. And he was.. But he still has that gambling addiction" Dash told them.

* * *

 _SEVERAL DAYS EARLIER:_

 _"You owe me money Bellic!" Cried Steve Erics, a small time gangster, who was holding a double barrel shotgun._

 _Dash came into room, unaware of the "guest"._

 _"Roman, are you oka- Wow!"_

 _"(pointing the gun) Fuck off you tit-less bitch!" Steve threatened._

 _"Look.. Just calm down Mr Erics, I'll get you the mon-_

 _Steve whipped the gun into Roman's stomach, very hard, enough to make Roman fall onto the floor._

 _"Hey!.. Leave him alone!" Dash said angrily._

 _"Stay out of this lady.. Your friend here owes me a LOT of money!" Steve said, just as angrily._

 _"Christ Roman.. Didn't Niko talk about your gambling!" Dash cried._

 _"I can't help it" Roman admitted._

 _Steve suddenly aimed the gun at Roman's head._

 _"Well.. Now you die for i-_

 _But suddenly there was a loud bang and a bullet went though Steve's head, from behind, and he fell down dead, as blood sprayed against a nearby wall._

 _"There.. Problem salved" Dash chuckled, as she put her Browning Pistol back into it's holster after having fired it._

 _"SALVED!?.. YOU KILLED HIM!" Roman cried angrily._

 _"I'm sorr-_

 _"I'm a witness to murder!" Cried a paranoid Roman._

 _"No silly.. Your a witness to self defense" Dash chuckled._

 _"This is funny to you!?.. God, you ARE like Niko!.. A cold killer!" Roman cried, though he didn't REALLY mean it, it was just heat of the moment._


	9. Chapter 9

LATER THAT EVENING:

Sense Packie didn't have any spare rooms, sense Gordon took one. Niko decided to let Dash spend the night at Roman's house.

Roman and Mallory obviously wouldn't mind, they adore Dash.

* * *

"Listen sweetie.. I owe you an apology.. You saved my life from Steve Erics, and... I guess I kinda insulted you for it" Roman admitted.

"It's okay.. I know you didn't mean it Roman, you were just scared" Dash replied.

"But least it's over" she added.

But at that exact moment, a van pulled up, one of them angrily screamed out that they killed Steve, before firing an Uzi at them.

Roman tackled Dash down to the ground, saving her life.

"Or not" Dash said sarcastically.

The van started driving back to them, but suddenly Niko took out the double barrel that they kept from the dead Steve Erics, killing the driver because of his skilled aim.

The driver dies and caused the van the crash into a pole, giving Dash and Roman enough time to run into cover as the other 3 members got out, shooting Uzi's at the three of them.

Dash took out her Browning Pistol and fired at them, killing one them, but the other two shoot back at her, one of them hitting her in the stomach, much to Niko's anger. And he threw a grenade under the van, blowing up the van, and killing both enemies in the explosion.

"Fuck you!" Niko cried, flipping the dead bodies the middle finger before running over to Dash, only to find out, to his relief, it was only a flesh wound, Dash will be fine.

Niko gave her a kiss on the cheek, before going over inside, to get a phone.

* * *

"Uh, Packie.. We have a bit of a problem" Niko said into the phone.

 _Packie: What now?.. I'm tired._

"Remember Steve Erics?" Niko asked.

 _Packie: Sure.. Some wannabe Gangster who "got his"._

"Yes, him... But thing is.. Turns out he's 'connected'.. And they tired to kill Dash.. We got them, but I have a feeling it's not over" Niko him.

 _Packie: Hmm.. Well don't worry, we've been in this before.. We can handle some wannabe's._

* * *

 **I'll end the story here..**

 **Though obviously there is more to come.**


End file.
